All posts filed under: Insights

Yes to Nose & no to plastic surgery

Recently I read a blog post in which the author openly described the process of her considering plastic surgery on her nose so to improve her looks. My reaction? A blog post-worthy comment. I was so inspired because I have had my own troubles relating to my nose and to other parts of my body. This post is a further exploration of my thoughts and feelings. I cheer for everyone who chose to not use plastic surgery but to accept themselves as they are instead. Or to at least aim to learn to accept themselves. Getting to self-acceptance takes a lot of practice, I acknowledge that. I cheer for this because the positive effects of plastic surgery are so little. I would almost say that they are insignificant to the unwanted side-effects. The only positive thing about it is the change in looks, really. The other effects include: physical stress or damage, financial costs, negative side-effects that are associated to making the surgery happen (e.g. carbon emissions, involved money flows). Then there’s the psychological effects …

Know your value

Dear lovers, I likely need to restructure my work (here) so to make it more accessible and more valuable. I will update you as soon as I know more about how it will happen. 💓 Now I will share something I wrote half a year ago about knowing your value. Since then, I have come to value myself a lot more. I get so caught up in world problems and in feeling responsible for things, including the feelings of people around me, that I forget to just be. I still have this negative belief that I am not good enough or not worthy of love. This belief tells me that I have to meet all kinds of requirements to earn respect and love. Conditional love this is. I also hold the belief that I am ugly. I feel ashamed for having this belief. I feel torn between loving myself and my body and being humble. I long for looks to not matter and for not judging people or bodies based on their looks. On the other hand …

Express and expand yourself through clothing

Which colours we like to wear may say more about us than we realise. Colours can either hide or reveal parts of us: White is the combination of all colours and it allows all energy or light to shine through. When we wear white, we allow ourselves to shine and others to see us. In turn, when we wear black, we hide our energy, we keep it in, we stay small and invisible. This has to do with the colours that are associated with the seven chakras; the colours we choose to wear may resonate with certain chakras and thereby enhance their brightness. I find this fascinating, mostly because these processes generally occur unconsciously. I am naturally drawn to the colour emerald and now I wonder what that says about my energy. How does my aura look? Does this colour bring balance to me? Or does it mostly emphasize what’s already abundant and therefore mostly sustain my current ‘pattern’? One can use this kind of knowledge to grow. Wearing and surrounding yourself with the colours …

Space invader #2: to speak your truth

I have come to learn that my judgement, intuition and wisdom are among the most valuable things I have to offer the world. Some time ago I described myself as ‘harmony-seeking quiet observer learning to speak loud and clear when needed’, which you may read below my blog posts. Earlier, in Space invader #1, I already wrote that I was learning to take up space. Now I am learning to speak my truth. My self-description is so accurate: so to not disturb the current balance I would often retreat in silence. But now I have come to see that ‘the current balance’ is often a state of imbalance – my contributions are needed to restore actual balance! One characteristic of spiritual growth or spiritual people is to become or be free of shyness, to be confident about speaking the truth. I have read this multiple times and I believe it is true. Being able to speak your truth is a quality to obtain through spiritual growth or personal development. “Wise men say that rushing is …

Expected lessons from personal growth program

Hello lovelies, I want to write about some recent personal experiences surrounding the possible enrolment in an online ‘personal/spiritual development’ program. It was the first time that I seriously considered participating in such an e-course. I had encountered ‘similar’ programs before, but due to the high investments of money and time I never saw it as an option. This time when I found this program it felt more plausible for me to join. In the end I decided against joining the program. I would like to share why, because I harvested various valuable lessons here. It’s a lengthy post, but you can follow the headings and ‘side-notes’ if you prefer. Pros Several identified things contributed to my enthusiasm about this program. First, I like and trust the person that organizes it. I have been reading her newsletters and watched her videos and I trust her judgement concerning which information is valuable to receive and in which way, etcetera. Next, I would appreciate some consistency in my like. This program would last for a long time …

To have a life purpose

Whoosh, autumn is totally rocking this week! Although I’m not thrilled about it, I can find peace in the idea that this means that we get to create and enjoy the indoor cosiness that usually comes with gloomy weather. I really feel like cosying up together with others. As if aligned with the weather, this week my body actually forced me to stop doing anything besides taking rest. This was hard to accept at first, but now I am happy I got to spend some time with myself. I’ve been wanting to share with you something: I have found my life purpose! I will not specify it here yet, but I am positive that knowing it will help me a lot. I cannot know if it will last for my whole life, but I think that it will last for a long time and that it will help me in my life and that it will guide me to where I need to go. I do regard it as my life purpose, it feels completely …

The Feminine uncovered

Something really powerful is happening: women all over the world are empowering themselves and others through reconnecting with the feminine. It appears that for way too long we have been living in societies dominated by the masculine. Masculinity is generally regarded as more powerful than femininity and its power has brought us to where we are today, but to grow further we need to embrace the feminine and reclaim our feminine power. My interested in femininity got renewed after reading and hearing about the ongoing developments. This is a movement I would want to be part of! However, first I’d have to connect to the feminine myself… What is femininity really? And how does it relate to female, and to masculine and male? The search In my search, last December I suggested to a feminism discussion group to discuss a theme related to it: sexuality, femininity and masculinity, to which extent we identify with our sex and gender and which role this plays in society. A few weeks later I found myself hosting the very …

Space invader #1: the first insights

Until not long ago I had never considered ‘taking up space’ as a thing. Since I do, I have started to see it in everything. I have found it to be an incredibly useful concept in my personal development! Here I will share my story, including the first new insights and developments. Throughout my youth I seem to have conditioned myself to adapt quite actively to my surroundings. I would examine, partly unconsciously, situations carefully and adapt to them. As we know, situations often involve other people doing all kinds of things. Soft-spoken We examine other people in terms of their looks, whether they’re nice or not, whether we suspect to have things in common, and in my case: whether they’re loud or not. I had come to think that loudness was an important factor for me to get along easily with someone or not; generally I would click better with more soft-spoken people than with loud people. That rule of thumb worked quite well. Using this and other things I managed to surround myself …

Self care, you, me and beauty

Recently I played a game in which so-called ‘revealing cards’ asked my boyfriend and me wicked personal questions and we had to answer in complete honesty. Some where not so difficult, but others made me think. These questions and answers are so interesting – such good food for thought! – that I’ll drop them here. So, what would you say when a silly card asks you the seemingly simple yet existential question: Question: “When do you choose for yourself?” Do you have an answer? I think a lot about ‘these kind of things’, but this question is difficult! I hadn’t thought about it this way. Maybe you’d want to think about your answer before reading on. When do you choose for yourself? … Is it when you leave everything be and be with your own needs and feelings? This can be choosing for yourself, choosing to take care of yourself. But then, if you choose for yourself, are you not just being selfish? I find this distinction difficult sometimes. I think that in our culture …

Spirituality meets polyamory, and they fall in love

My previous writings about polyamory resulted in me getting quite some comments and questions from friends along the lines of ‘this is all nice and good, but aren’t you just perfectly monogamous?’ Well, I may as well am, but this depends on how you see. My first post about the topic was intended to grow some familiarity with the term polyamory, with the possible interpretations and implications. Today I will tell you more about why I find polyamory important. The bottom line of my previous post: Polyamory is about respecting your relationships and doing your best to make it work for everyone involved. It is about being able to love multiple people at the same time and it is in no way an excuse to treat others unethically. What I didn’t mention explicitly is that for me polyamory is closely related to spirituality. This again depends on your definition of spirituality. I could use personal development as an alternative. I’ll use them both here. What I mean with this spirituality or personal development is the …